Your Dose of Weekend Inspiration: Luciana Mello

Natural Hair Pet Peeve: "Girl, You Got That Good Hair!"

"I can't go natural. My hair is too nappy for that."

"YOU can have natural hair because you have good  hair."

This is one of my top natural hair pet peeves...thinking your hair isn't "good" enough to be natural. A couple weeks ago I was reading someone's tumblr post about how she's tired of women thinking that they're more in tune with their African roots because they have natural hair. I understood where she was coming from, but then she went on to say that she wouldn't be able to have natural hair because her hair was too "tough" and that when she was a young child, her mom couldn't deal with her hair...which is why she relaxed it. I've even read one person say that their new growth is tough enough to scrub pots.

My thing is... many of us have this story. Our mothers basically battled our natural hair, believed it was unmanageable, and gave us relaxers. However, imagine how many women would be natural today if we all stuck with the "natural hair is unmanageable" mindset. Personally, I think too many people equate new growth with natural hair. Just because your new growth seems tough, doesn't mean your natural hair will be the same way. In comparison to relaxed, kink-free hair, of course new growth isn't as easy to comb.

Initially, going even 6 weeks without a relaxer was a challenge for me. I used to think "How am I going to deal with this new growth?!" So, I can see why some people are reluctant to go natural. However, I learned the products and techniques that worked well for me and I learned how to stretch my relaxers for at least 3 months at a time. Even now, detangling on wash days is a breeze despite the fact that I have every texture ranging from 3c-4c...yes, 4c!

People need to stop laying the blame on their hair as to why they can't go natural. Our hair is always the bad guy, yet WE are the ones who are supposed to take care of it properly. I don't care how unmanageable your new growth seems, if you really want to have natural hair you will take the time to learn what your hair likes and dislikes, how to treat it, etc...just like how you take time to figure out how to treat your relaxed hair. I'd rather someone just be straight up and say they prefer relaxed hair or that they're not ready to go natural yet.

Contrary to popular belief, NO ONE'S hair is too coarse, nappy, tough or dry to go natural. I honestly believe that God would not give Black people hair that we couldn't manage and rock with confidence. If you truly think that only people with loose curls can have beautiful, manageable natural hair, that's a personal issue that you need to figure out. You won't KNOW how manageable or unmanageable natural hair is until you HAVE natural hair...not just new growth, lol.

Remembering Aaliyah

Today marks 9 years since Aaliyah passed, but she is still loved and remembered by many. I remember the day I found out she died--I was only 11, but it was still shocked and sad. She was, and still is, one of my favorite singers.

Not only was she loved for her "street, but sweet" sound and personality, but for many women (natural and relaxed), she is a hair inspiration. Supposedly, she was natural, but pressed her hair. Check out some of my favorite hair pics of Aaliyah:

Featured Onyx Rose: Chelsea

OR: Where are you from?

Chelsea: New York

OR: Random fun fact about yourself?

Chelsea: I have been dancing since I was four years old. Ballet, Jazz, Tap, Modern, Hip Hop, Swing, Character etc.

OR: What inspired you to go natural?

Chelsea: The lack of growth. Yes, my hair grew, but it did not gain length over the 11 years that I had a relaxer. I saw videos on Youtube revealing the different things we could do with our hair and showing textures. I never really remembered how my hair looked when it was wet I only remember it after it was blown out. I saw so many strong black females that were natural and it made me feel strong. With my CBL (collar bone length)-APL (armpit length) hair my face hid behind my strands. My hair was also thin and kind of lifeless. Even now as a natural my strands are thin, thought you cannot tell as much. I hoped that by going natural I could wear my hair curly and coily as I always preferred, and I could attain length like I wanted to... as well as, if I straightened my hair it be more full.

OR: How long did you transition/Describe your transitioning experience.
Chelsea: I transitioned for 9 months. Initially, I would let my hair grow out for a while and I would see what my texture was looking like before I just decided to cut it. My last relaxer was in May 2009. Over the summer I said since I had recently gotten a very good flat ironing technique I would flat iron my roots so that it wouldn't look so bad. When I got back to UNC I eased up on the flat ironing after I got a silk wrap from my hair stylist. Then in October I looked at hundreds more natural videos and I learned that I needed to start treating my hair better and differently. I made an immediate change as my roommate Monica and I both decided to actually go natural together. However, I'm impatient and she's length obsessed, so I BC'd in February and she's still transitioning.

Also, one thing I did not expect that many naturals do not have much knowledge of was 'hair shock.' It is possible for your hair to go into shock directly after you cut it. If you look at my BC picture you will see the straight ends and general lack of texture all through out my hair. My hair remained this way for about 2 months before it actually started to 'act right' as I call it. No it wasn't damaged ends and no it was not my texture. I did no cuts from that point, but my ends started curling in some areas and not in others. Obviously, this is a rare case that may have to do with my particular texture, but it was still the best experience of my life.

OR: What do you love about your natural hair?
Chelsea: I love that I know so much about it now and that it is so versatile. I get compliments on my hair like every other day!

OR: What's one natural hair myth you wish would die?

Chelsea: Everyone seems to think that only 'my hair' will do that, and that theirs is much 'nappier.'


OR: Has your natural hair changed how you view yourself?

Chelsea: It has not changed how I view myself, but it has changed how others view me and how they look at me which I love!
OR: Name your top three hair products and what you like about them.

Chelsea: These arranged in the order that I discovered them in during my natural journey.

My first love was Giovanni Smooth as Silk Conditioner. It made my coils pop more then they originally had, however, I had used this as a deep conditioner and found that it actually was not enough moisture for my hair. I still love it as a conditioner, just not a deep conditioner.
My second love is the green olive oil Ecostyler gel because it makes a fabulous wash and go! I love that it is soooo cheap and I can get great definition from it whether I apply it on dry hair or wet hair.

My third love is Miss Jessie's Baby Buttercreme (MJ BBcreme) works wonders on my hair and I love it!! I gives my hair shine, moisture, and great twists and twist outs. This is also my number one favorite right now.

My fourth (sorry) is Blended Beauty Happy Nappy Creme or Blended Cuties Down and Out Styles (they are the exact same product). They make for wonderful coils and it works the same as MJ BBcreme.

OR: What advice do you have for those thinking about transitioning?

Chelsea: I would say do you research!! It is vital and it will help you find loads of people that support you and care about helping you! It will show you tricks and tips and also you will end up finding your own tricks and special secret products!

OR: Where can people find you online?

Chelsea:

Website
I blog about hair mostly and I throw in random life blogs too like fitness or fashion or food.

Onyx Rose Asks You: Heat Damage

Recently I've seen a lot of people talk about their natural hair and heat damage. I am AFRAID of using heat on my hair. I used a blow dryer (and a heat protectant) on my hair last week and even though I have Senegalese twists in right now, I'm still wondering whether or not my hair will be fine once I take these twists out. Some people get heat damage their first time using heat, while others use heat all the time and never have an issue with their hair curling back up.

My Question to You:
How often do you use heat and what do you do to make sure that you don't experience heat damage/what are your favorite heat protectants?

...Let Me Update You!

I start my junior year in college next Monday, so I probably won't have the time to post EVERY day, but there will be a couple posts a week and I will continue to feature people, so continue sending in your stories! I've been blessed this summer, not just with this blog, but in my life overall and I'm very grateful. God is good.

What's going on with my hair?

I got Senegalese twists on Wednesday. This will be my protective style for the next 2 months and I'm excited to see how much my hair grows until then. I'll do a post about these and other protective styles I've done in the past.

I want to thank everyone who visits my blog daily, re-tweets my posts, comments, etc. I appreciate you all!

P.S. shoutout to the ladies who participated in my natural hair chat last Sunday. It was great, thanks to you guys. I'll do another one, but i'm not sure when yet. And if you haven't already, please become a fan of Onyx Rose on Facebook.

Have a great weekend!

Product Review: Wonder Curl Products

Price: I entered a Wonder Curl contest on Twitter and won the 2 oz. bottles of this (Get Set Hair Jelly) and the Get Slick Hair Smoothie for free. However, you can get the 2 oz gel for $5 and the 4 oz hair smoothie for $7 on their site.

Ingredients: Aloe Barbadensis (Organic Aloe Vera) juice, Hamamelis Virginiana (Witch Hazel), Phenoxyethanol, d-Calcium Pantothenate, Panthenol, Kosher Vegetable Glycerin, Alcohol denatured, Carbomer, TEA, Tetrasodium EDTA, Citric Acid, Polyquaternium 7, Fragrance.

Description: Get Set Hair Jelly smooths, soothes and controls frizz without stiffness. Used with organic aloe vera which for many is a miraculous plant. In hair it is used to promote growth and revitalize hair. This jelly is also loaded with pro-vitamin B5 (panthenol) to strengthen your hair. Get Set Hair Jelly keeps your coils looking fresh and fabulous all day.

My Opinion: First of all, I love the smell. It smells really...fresh. I can't think of any other way to put it, lol. I applied the hair smoothie and then I applied this gel. This gel defined my 3c curls in the back very well and although it gave nice hold, it was a little crunchy (even though I applied the hair smoothie first). For the rest of my hair, the gel did nothing, but I wasn't surprised because most gels don't do anything for my hair for some reason.

Rating: 2/5

Ingredients: Organic Aloe Juice, Organic Castor Oil, Organic Coconut Oil, Distilled Aloe water, Hydroxyethyl Cellulose,Phenoxyethanol, Acai Gum,Tetrasodium EDTA, Citric Acid, Fragrance.



Description: Get Slick Hair Smoothie provides your hair with the benefits of organic coconut oil and organic castor oil. Coconut oil, known for its benefits to skin and hair, is the only oil that penetrates the hair shaft to strengthen. Castor oil, also known for its medicinal properties, protects hair, prevents hair loss and promotes hair growth. Using Get Slick Hair Smoothie will keep your hair looking soft, shiny and strong.

My Opinion: When I initially applied this to my hair it felt great...even 20 minutes later it felt soft and moisturized. However, my hair didn't stay moisturized for long. I've used this product multiple times as a moisturizer and it was the same story each time. Although my hair felt soft, it was dry.

Rating: 2/5

Although the products didn't work for me, I'd like to thank Wonder Curl for being generous enough to send me these products.

Featured Onyx Rose: Sheena

OR: Where are you from?

Sheena: I am from Chicago but I've lived in New York for 7 months now.

OR: Random fun fact about yourself?

Sheena: I recently started Afro-Caribbean dance classes and it's so much fun. There's more to it than I thought. We often spend an entire hour just on ballet techniques. It's also magical what happens when you become one with the drum. Also another fun fact...I make about 80% of all my hair/body/cleaning products. It's not a plug for a business just a way to highlight what ANYONE can do at home with some simple ingredients.

OR: What inspired you to go natural?

Sheena: I wasn't inspired, I was more so frustrated. Back in 2002 my hair stopped taking relaxers. Not sure if that has ever happened to anyone. Therefore it was just a waste to keep relaxing it since it wasn't working. One girl at my college had just cut every inch off [her hair] right around the time I was so fed up and so I just cut my hair off too. I had no clue what would happen, but I figured it would make a more interesting story to try it than to not.

OR: How long did you transition/Describe your transitioning experience.

Sheena: I transitioned with braids for 1 to 2 years, but I'd chicken out and get a relaxer again. Finally, I transitioned for 8 months. But once I went in to cut it off, I just told the stylist to cut it all off. I really had nothing to lose.

OR: What do you love about your natural hair?

Sheena: I love the volume, the flexibility in styles and the curls. You know, it reminds me of the rest of my body. I don't have a stick figure. I have curves all over my body and my hair is the same way too. At work there is just this thing that goes around about how no one ever knows what my hair might look like. I come in with a fro, micro twists, braid outs...it could be anything.

OR: What's one natural hair myth you wish would die?

Sheena: That if you do a big chop you might look like a boy. It just sounds crazy to me. Seriously, there is no logic in that. I feel that if you look like a boy with short hair, you probably look like a boy with long hair. I don't mean to offend anyone but the point is if you are beautiful with long hair you can be beautiful with short hair too. At no point during any of my short styles did I ever get mistaken for a man. Rock ANY length!

OR: Has your natural hair changed how you view yourself?

Sheena: No. I have always had a positive sense of self and as I grow and evolve and try new things, my understanding of self grows with that. Having curly hair didn't change the essence of me. It just gave me a few more inches in height.

OR: Name your top three hair products and what you like about them.

Olive oil - Whether I use it alone or in a homemade concoction, it works. Simple as that.

Essential oils - I love adding them to my mixes. Lavendar, Rose, Tea Tree. The possibilities are endless. They have many different ways of working with your hair and the fragrances created are phenomenal.

Rose Water - It mixes well with my distilled water spray that I put on my hair almost daily. Add in some vegetable glycerin and essential oils and its just a nice spritz for your hair.

OR: What advice do you have for those thinking about transitioning?

Sheena: Let go of the fears, myths and stereotypes you might be harboring. Hair grows back. So, even if you try being natural and end up not liking it, hair grows back. Try a change, try something new...that's the only way new discoveries are made...even as it relates to hair.

OR: Where can people find you online?

Website
Twitter
Youtube

True Story: Natural Hair Discrimination in the Workplace

Felicia's Story:

I was called by the salon manager of JcPenney for an interview. The funny thing about it is she did my hair during the time I was experimenting with the idea of going natural. At that time she worked at a different salon, but I had only gone to her that one time. Anyway, the day of the interview I wore a half wig because at the time I had a regimen that I wanted to stick to for the month. So, to keep myself from messing in my hair daily I would wash it, put it in a bunch of single braids, put on the wig, and go until the next wash day (you know how us serious hair care ladies get when we get a routine going). So, I'm like I'm not gonna go off my weekly routine for a few minutes at a interview, I'll just put my wig on like I've been doing and go. I get to the interview, she tells me about the reception position and as long as I know how to book appointments, sell products, answer phones and use the computer, I'm good.

A few weeks later I got a call that my background check passed and I can go in for orientation and training. By this time my month-long routine is up and I decide that for my first day I'm gonna wear a wash 'n go, which on my hair kinda turns into a kinky curly fro. I go in for orientation, I do my paper work, I read over the company policy and dress code, and I watch the videos... you know normal first day stuff. It's myself and another woman as we're both going to be working the same position. As we're getting the tour of the store we see the salon manager in passing. We both said hi and kept it moving.

I get home and started fixing myself some lunch when my phone rings. It's the JcPenney salon manager. She says, "Hey I was just calling to let you know that dreads and twists are not allowed to be worn in the salon as we do not offer those styles." I could already see where the conversation was going but I'm like, "Girl you've been unemployed for 11 months, you got 40 cents in your bank account, no money coming in at all. Try to compromise." So, I said OK, I didn't have my hair in dreads or twists. She asked, "Well how did you wear your hair today?" I said, it was in a wash and go it's kind of a curly afro." She said, "Oh no you can't come in here like that." In my mind I'm like, "Did this b-tch just say that?",but I bit my tongue and thought about my bank account and how long I've been out of work. So, I said, "Well I'm not gonna relax my hair, but I can press it from time to time and wear wigs or weave." She then tells me I can't wear that either because they don't offer those services and people would come in and know my hair was fake... mind you all of this is coming from a Black woman. She then tells me that by wearing these styles and being in the front of the salon I would attract people wanting those styles. She tells me that if I'm not willing to cut and color my hair frequently (as the stylists often use the receptionist to advertise their skill and the stylists cut and color each others hair all the time), that maybe I should rethink working in a salon. At this point I'm in shock and at a lost for words. So, she's like, "Hello are you still there?" She laughs and asks me what did I expect to come with working in a salon. Then she said, "Well think about it and I'll call you Monday to see what you wanna do."


I got off the phone and cried like a baby. I called my mom and my boyfriend who rushed to my house ready to go up to the salon, lol. My mom advised me to call the human resources (HR) lady that I had been with that day to let her know what happened and to ask if I could be considered for a position in another area in the store. The store manager calls me the next day to tell me that what the salon manager told me is not company policy at the store in any department. The only policy about hair is that it has to be clean and well-kept. She told me how sorry she was over and over and I'm like you should not be the one saying sorry, you didn't say those things to me. She said she would be more then happy to transfer me to another department in the store, as she can understand if I no longer wanted to work in the salon.

Featured Onyx Rose: Cheneri

OR: Where are you from?

Cheneri: Southern Louisiana

OR: Random fun fact about yourself?
Cheneri: I have never weighed over 100 pounds except when I was pregnant. I know... too petite!

OR: What inspired you to go natural?

Cheneri: I started eating healthier and exercising, so why not take care of your hair naturally also!
OR: How long did you transition/Describe your transitioning experience.

Cheneri: My last perm was Aug 2009 and I did the BC in June 2010. The journey was just what it's called a JOURNEY. During the transition I mostly wore weave in my hair or wore ponytails. I didn't really care for both my natural hair and relaxed hair in a style because living in the south, our heat can ruin a hairstyle quick. But for the most part I experienced different hair styles long: curly, short, even big. But I always conditioned my hair real good every time before getting it redone. The only thing I wish i would have changed was getting my ends trimmed. Since I rarely wore my own hair I didn't trim my ends. So the last few months I was debating on doing the BC. I went to visit my old hair dresser to get some tips and she looked at my hair and said its going to be short but I was like "I'm Cheneri" and she said, "Yes, you gonna rock it"...lol! So, she said get in the chair, I was shocked! That day I felt relieved! A new chapter had begun!!

OR: What do you love about your natural hair?
Cheneri: I love that it takes me back to my roots. It's natural!! I don't wear make-up, so when getting perms it's like putting on make-up. Now I'm all natural... face and hair!

OR: What's one natural hair myth you wish would die?

Cheneri: I wish people would stop thinking long, permed hair is the best thing because really Natural hair is the best way. It's all you. ALL ORIGINAL!

OR: Has your natural hair changed how you view yourself?

Cheneri: I'm still the same person. Just a more overall natural person!

OR: Name your top three hair products and what you like about them.

Cheneri: Since I'm still new to using products on my natural hair, I'm still looking for products that just fit my hair. So, I really don't have a favorite product yet!


OR: What advice do you have for those thinking about transitioning?

Cheneri: For those in the transitioning stage or thinking about joining the movement... RESEARCH, RESEARCH, RESEARCH is the key. Don't go in it head first without knowing because it can discourage you and make you back out. Don't listen to what others have to say. Do it for you, not for others.

OR: Where can people find you online?

Cheneri:

Facebook
Twitter

Trina Talks "Natural Hair"

In a recent interview, rapper Trina spoke about wearing her "natural hair":

I am just evolving into more of a woman, and I love it. Lately, I have been wearing my natural hair, so that’s a change for me. I love getting facials and taking care of my skin because that’s really important especially since I’m always performing and wearing makeup. I do have a stylist, but I love to try new and different things that work for me!

My Question For You:

Does it bother you when people refer to their relaxed hair as their "natural hair"? I'm sure Trina just meant her weave-free hair, but would it be more appropriate for her to refer to it as her "real hair" or do you think that it doesn't make a difference?

Protein & (My) Natural Hair

Silk Amino Acids. Wheat Amino Acids. Animal Collagen. Keratin.

Call it what you want, but generally, my hair doesn't really care for protein. You could say it's "protein sensitive" (dry, brittle hair as the result of using products that contain protein).


Recap:

• Cantu's line of products smell great and look promising, but my hair HATES them (well, two of the products at least).
• When I first tried Suave's Almond and Shea Butter Conditioner, I thought I loved it, but I soon realized that this conditioner made my hair feel dryer than usual (almond is a source of protein). It wasn't moisturizing enough.

However, my hair does love certain light protein conditioners:

• Organic Root Stimulator Replenishing Conditioner - was a staple of mine for almost two years until recently (I stopped using it because it contains Triethanolamine).
• Aveeno Nourish + Condition Leave-In Treatment - is currently my favorite leave in conditioner. It contains wheat protein; however, I'm always surprised at how soft it leaves my hair.
  

Generally, natural hair doesn't need as many protein treatments as relaxed hair. Although hair is made up of protein, the chemicals in relaxers change the structure of one's hair; therefore the hair loses protein, strength, and elasticity. So, protein treatments help restore the strength and elasticity lost. If you're natural and you dye or flat iron your hair frequently, you're not out of the woods. You should still make sure that you're using protein occasionally. If using heat and dye doesn't apply to you, then I wouldn't worry too much about using protein.

As always, some naturals love protein, while others hate it. Everyone's hair is different, so don't be surprised if your hair ends up loving protein and don't be disappointed if your hair can't tolerate protein at all.

Shingai Shoniwa Knows She's Sexy With Her Natural Hair

This month's issue of Pride Magazine, a British magazine that has catered to black women for 20 years, is now out. It features Noisettes singer and natural hair beauty, Shingai Shoniwa. In the issue Shingai states, "You don't need straight hair to be successful or sexy."


Preach! Sounds like a great issue.

More gorgeous photos of Shingai:












Ever Fall In Love (With Someone You Shouldn’t Have) - Noisettes