When I first told my mom that I was going natural, she was basically like, "Yeah, ok." I'm sure she thought that I was just stretching my relaxers and when I was tired of dealing with my new growth, I'd go running to her for a touch up. Wrong. I BCed while I was at school, so my parents didn't see my TWA until almost 2 months later. My mom loved my hair, but my dad? Not so much. He doesn't really make negative comments, but it's clear that it'll be a long time before he loves my afro puffs. Either way I'm glad that no one in my family refers to my hair as "nappy" or makes other derogatory comments because it would definitely be a never ending battle and they would lose every time, lol. Some women aren't so lucky though. It saddens me to know that many people have absolutely no support from their families and significant others...it sure would make the transition to natural hair a lot easier. Although I do understand why older generations have issues accepting natural hair, sometimes I wonder if there will ever be a point when they are supportive and understand why more women are ditching relaxers and transitioning to natural hair.
If your family is criticizing you for going natural, all I can tell you is DO YOU. I know it is only natural to seek the approval of the people you love, but sometimes your happiness and peace of mind is more important than the opinions of others. Ultimately, you are the one who has to walk around with natural hair, not your family. So, if you are comfortable rocking your kinks, that is all that matters. Have confidence in yourself and know that YOU are not the "crazy" one. It's crazy for others not to accept one of your most unique, beautiful characteristics.
How did your family/ significant other respond to your transition to natural hair? How did you deal with their reaction?
My mother has been perming my hair since I was 4 years old. My hair was down my back and I had to her several times I wanted to go natural. She would always be like "girl you are not gonna be able to comb that mess". Well, finally one day I was serious and she was not supportive at all (even though at the time she was natural). She has come around slowly, but still likes my hair better when I twist it or something. My dad on the other hand has locs and is 100% on board with me. :-) It is wonderful to have the support.
ReplyDeleteMy hubby loves my hair, and my family generally likes it more when I have it styles like two strand twists then when I have my fro or twist out, but I don't get any negative comments.
ReplyDeleteI had this issue in the beginning. My mother HATED the idea ... & she probably still does. I started transitioning when I was abroad so he just thought I'd get a relaxer when I came home. nope. she HATED it and she thought my hair wasn't going to be professional and I wasn't going to get re-hired for my internship [I did, btw lol] Then she moved on to asking me about texturizers and I'm like .. NO CHEMICALS. She just doesn't get it. When I'm home now I usually wear my hair in flexi rods or straight. It's just easier, but she knows one day its coming full on. I hope she'll accept it, but if not, I'm just gonna keep on doin me :)
ReplyDeleteMy husband and my children love my hair. And, since going natural my oldest daughter big chopped a few months ago. They were all pretty excepting of me embracing my natural...lucky for them, because I was gonna do me .....anyway (LOL)
ReplyDeleteTake care
zainab1
AuNaturale007.blogspot.com
I think it's silly not to support someone because their going natural. It's just hair. Some people cut it, some people dye it, some people add hair to it. I think women especially in the black community need to stop feeding into stereotypes and the media.
ReplyDeleteMy family was pretty supportive, especially my grandma and my auntie when I did the BC.
ReplyDeleteHey ladies,
ReplyDeleteIt's nice to know that even if your family was/is not supportive of your natural hair, you don't allow their opinions to keep you from doing what YOU want to do. It does sound silly for people not to be supportive of natural hair, but the fact of the matter is that the whole "good hair" belief in the black community comes with a lot of social history behind it. It will be a long time before the majority of people's perceptions change...especially older folks.
I am currently transitioning and my husband is totally on board. As a matter of fact he is the one who is encouraging me to BC. It really really great to have support the one person whose opinion matter the most. :-)
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